Chinese Food - Hungry Again After 30 Minutes?

Ok, it's my blog.  I'm going to write what I want.  And I am not going to apologize.  So don't even ask.  And don't try to shame me.  I am a cradle Catholic.  I know shame.

That being said, let's talk about Chinese food.  I think I have a love affair with it.  It's true.  I'm pretty sure I am the only American who can go to China and gain weight.  So that's why I titled this post with an old stereotype.... eat all the Chinese food you want and you're hungry again in a half hour.

My personal experience with authentic Chinese food in places like Shanghai, Beijing and Suzhou is far different from what you find in the US and what you might expect in China.  First of all, drop all expectations.  1 - From what I could discover, they don't eat dog in China, at least not in any local restaurants that cater to the local residents and foreigners.  And I asked.  Maybe they used to, maybe all the dogs have been eaten, I don't know.  But for the time I was there, I was told, "we don't eat dog."  2 - If you eat good Chinese food, you won't go away hungry and you won't be hungry in 30 minutes.  Good Chinese cuisine is delicate, intricate, layered and unbelievable in the myriad of flavors they expose.  3 - There is some Chinese food you should never eat.

Sea cucumber is one such product (above).  Don't let the locals sway you with talk of how delicious it is.  (MEN! don't let them tell you how good it is for your virility.)  Don't believe them when they say it is a delicacy.  Though I guess in some provinces it is a delicacy.  But it does not suit the American palate.  Though it does not really have a strong flavor, the way it was served called up my gag reflex.  Served in a cool, yellow sauce of indeterminate substance, I grabbed my piece of sea cucumber with my chop sticks, brought it decisively up to my smiling lips, and just as I was about to sink my teeth into it, my Italian dining partner gagged a little to my right.  He had just "tasted" it.  How could I abort?  How could I return it to my plate without offending my host?  Couldn't be done.  I ate it.  And I too gagged.  Silently.  It's not the flavor, it's the consistency.  The cool temperature combined with the slightly fleshy, slightly pudding-like texture was so unexpected I couldn't process in my head that this was a food substance. 

Not to worry though.  There is SO MUCH good food in China.  No, there is really some yummy delicious authentic Chinese food.  Once you taste it, you may never eat Chinese food in America again.

This is not one of them though.  I saw this on one of the menus and had to take a picture of it.  It makes me think of a pygmy hippo coated in teriyaki bbq sauce swimming up through a lake of little bok choy bits.  Not appetizing, yet intriguing....

 Last on the list of things you shouldn't try while in China is this little scrumptious bit.  I don't remember what it was and I can't really define it, but when you bite into it, you will be reminded of the thrill of biting into a piece of steak or pork or chicken, expecting a delicious meat-like flavor and texture to be met instead with a chunk of gristle and fat.  Yes.  This one, is also a no-no.

So I started today's comments talking about the glorious splendors of the intricate flavors of Chinese cuisine and spent the entire time telling you about less than delicious foods.  And I'm sorry for that.  But, I have yet to find my photos of the good stuff (two moves across a state and then across the country) so I have to apologize (even tho I said at the beginning of this I would not apologize...)  So... stay tuned for Chinese food part two.  Once I find my photos, I will be back.  ciao!

Wine in Thyme goes International!

Wine in Thyme returned to China in July.  This trip, we were in SE China, primarily Shenzhen and Shanghai (pronounce Shong hi.  Didn't realize I'd been pronouncing it with an Ohio accent all these years).  SE China is much different than Beijing, which is located in the NE of China.  Plus, we were here in July, not February.  Each day it was well over 90 degrees, and the humidity hovered at 90% or more. 

My associate and I took one night off from a traditional Chinese dinner with our Chinese host, and decided to "wing it".  Two crazy Americans alone for the night, ordering off a Chinese menu, and hoping for the best.  It was mid-week and we were feeling comfortable in this foreign country, at least we felt comfortable enough to point at pictures and place an order.  I have to admit, we weren't over adventurous.  We merely took the elevator to the third floor and chose the Chinese restaurant in the hotel:  Qin Yue Xuan.

First things first:

The wine was ordered. 

It arrived standing upright, not sideways as depicted here.  (My apologies, I am having a real difficulty with my images this weekend.)  It was pretty good, for a Chinese wine.  It was mildly spicy with a hint of yeastiness, not exactly what you want in a Cabernet, but I thought I could survive.

The wait staff was quite attentive.  The only other guests in the restaurant were four men, who appeared to be from a Russian or other former Soviet nation.  They spoke in hushed deep voices that resonated nonetheless.

Our waiter pronounced his name "Dream Yang".  Our waitress would not provide her name.

The menu is in Chinese and English.  But the pictures tell the real story.  I thought I would try this Grilled Eel with Gravy.

I can't say that I understood why they wanted their menu to be an interpretation of the road.  It offered "a kind of living embodiment of taste. A kind of quest for quality food."  All I know is, I was NOT going to order anything off this page.  I did not care to try the steamed longsnout catfish or the hot trotter.

 This is their Grilled Eggplant Japanese.  It looked delicious to me, as I love eggplant and really only know two ways to cook it, both involve tomato sauce and Italian seasonings.  So, in addition to the Eel, I ordered eggplant.  Our waiter, Dream Yang, looked at me with surprise, which quickly turned to confusion.  How was he going to politely tell a customer I shouldn't order both?  He called over his waitress to help interpret.  Between the two of them, we settled on a decision.  I would get a little bit of both dishes.  Much success!

Mixed Dragon Fish with Chili - nope, didn't try it.

I did not order the Geoduck Clam Sashimi.  It looked inedible to my American eyes.

Look at this delicious grilled eggplant!  Arrived at the table piping hot.  It was perfectly grilled - a slight crisp on the edges, and a well-cooked meaty interior.  Complemented by the light, sweet ginger brown sauce, with sesame, mild red and green peppers and onion for texture, it was one of the best dishes I ate all week. 

 Look how happy it made our hosts.  They were so pleased with our happiness, they gave us a 4 page questionnaire to complete.  My eel never did show up, but it was just as well.  The eggplant was enough for an entire meal.  I think that's why my waiter was upset - by ordering the eel and the eggplant, I was ordering enough to feed two or three people.  I didn't realize the pictures depicted almost life-size servings.  Stupid fat American.

(I have to apologize one more time for the photos.  I can not get them to come in correctly.)